Reason 3: They Know the Marriage Playbook
A Single Parent knows what it takes to be married
A single mom or dad knows marriage is hard work. They understand there is give and take and even if they were the reason the marriage ended, they will probably have a good idea where they went wrong.
I (Samantha) was a single mom. After my divorce, I read every book on marriage I could get my hands on. I went to counseling, seminars, and divorce recovery. I dragged my kids to single parent retreats. We hung out at Monday Night Solutions and gosh, dang, darn it…we got healthy!
Many times a single parent will do the hard work to develop emotional strength, strong boundaries and health. They don’t want to make the same mistakes again and they are willing to go the distance to make sure the next relationship is a keeper.
I see this play out now in my relationship with my husband Tim. In my previous marriage, I was used to being coddled. After being alone with two kids (and financially struggling) I learned to grow up and wear the big girl pants. Before, I would often hold a grudge too long and play the wounded victim for days. Now, I tend to move on and am much quicker to apologize. I take more responsibility for my actions and don’t sweat the small stuff.
Single parents go the extra mile and bury their innate selfishness, knowing certain small efforts will go a long way in making a relationship last.
I know I try harder the second time around…in all areas.
I learned all these valuable marriage tools simply by screwing them up the first time. I don’t recommend divorce, but I certainly learned what not to do! My second marriage is much richer because of the lessons learned through real and gritty experience.
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